I'M SO TIRED!
Stop looking at me. Stop it. It displeases me.
Ugh. I completely destroyed my sleeping pattern over the last two weeks and now I am most definitely paying the price. I know it will take a while to get back into the swing of things, but god damn did I forget how painful the process could me. I'm just hoping that attempting to get up so much earlier than I have been won't lead to the mental imbalance it usually does. May have to accept that I'm not a vampire (not yet) and therefore cannot stay up late and get up early without consequence.
It'll be worth it in the end I think. Mornings are so much more enjoyable when you're not late all the time. Until then I will attempt not to go on some kind of murder spree and will focus instead on replacing all the blood in my body with caffein.
In other news, check me out, posting more than twice in one year. I'm such a go getter.
In other other news, I really have nothing else to say. I just wanted to vent about how my head feels like lead and the tiredness is legitimately making me feel ill. WHY YOU DO DIS, BODY!? Just be chill, k.
Blah.
Love you like sleeping in on rainy days.
Sunday 4 January 2015
Thursday 1 January 2015
What up 2015?
It's been over a year since I posted to this site. That's a whole lot of time to have passed.
I read over some of my old posts and what can I say? Some things have changed a lot...Some things haven't changed at all.
How was 2014 for me? Overall it was great. There were some rough bits, but looking back I think 2014 was the happiest I've been for a very long time and thats a great feeling.
Today is my last day off before starting work again for 2015, and although sometimes I dislike parts of my job I am pretty pleased with it. They're obviously pleased with me because I was given a promotion and then a pay rise shortly after, which was nice. It's always nice to be appreciated for your efforts.
I've cut back on etsy orders significantly since getting a full time job, although I still do some here and there for my friends. It's far more enjoyable now I dont have to stress out about deadlines and shipping, and I've finally gotten to a point where I don't feel guilty spending my time on other things which has improved my mood greatly. I've been playing POE, and yesterday I bought the new COD game which is super weird because it feels like some sort of Halo/COD hybrid.
During last year I started to make some changes to my life that put a more prominent focus on improving myself and I'm happy with how those are going. I've been learning Spanish, which for a long time didn't seem to be improving at all, but in the last few months I have finally noticed an improvement there. I've also been doing archery, which I really enjoy. One of my goals for this year is to renew my efforts there, I got kind of lazy with it because I don't like going by myself. I'd really like to be competing by this time next year and getting my compound bow later this year should help with that considerably.
I've been singing more, doing scales and breathing exercises to help expand my range. I've been drawing more too, not just random stuff but actual practice pieces. At the moment I'm doing a facial features study and the progress I've made in just a week has blown me away.
As of next week I'll be attending the gym again. I joined up again a month or so ago but public holidays, time off, and family stuff meant I haven't really been a whole lot. I like the gym, the hardest part is dragging myself out of bed early enough to get there before work.
My other 2015 hobbies include violin, which I cant really claim to have achieved anything with yet and a couple of other new things that I'd like to get into. I'm pretty excited for the year ahead. For the first time in my life I am not adverse to practicing things and I look forward to seeing where this new mentality is going to take me.
As I mentioned, 2014 had some rough patches. My Nanna passed away late November which was tough, she was the only extended family I was really close with and she had been a big part of my life since the day I was born. I was devastated at the funeral, and it's surprising to me how often I catch myself thinking 'I should take a photo of this to show Nanna' or thinking I see her on the street. Weird little things that leave me feeling a little sad. Losing people is hard, but I know she's in a better place now. Her life was hard and she was in so much pain. I'm glad I had the time with her that I did though, to get to know her and love her.
Something I didn't expect though was that she would leave money to me in her will. I always anticipated that my mother and sister would be left something, they saw her nearly every day and helped her more than anyone else, but she surprised me by leaving me $15 000. More money than I've ever ever had in my life, and although I would trade that money for more time with her in a heartbeat, I'm so grateful for her kindness.
At this stage I'm planning to use 1 third of the money as the start of a home loan deposit, 1 third to book a trip to Europe (London, Paris and Rome) and the other third to buy a compound bow and a deep space telescope; two things I've wanted for a long time but that keep getting pushed down the list of 'things I actually need to buy'. She also left me her ruby earrings and a diamond and ruby necklace that I've barely taken off since.
So that was my 2014, and some of my plans for 2015. From here down it's just a letter to future me. I doubt anyone but I read these posts, and that suits me fine, but when you re read this, me, pay attention to the below-
Hey Angel,
2015 is a new start, and I want you to promise not to waste it. Looking back 10 years and at the time between then and now there were moments when I never thought I'd live to this day let alone be as happy as I am, that change is down to you. It's down to finding the things that make you happy and focusing on them. It's down to finding the things that make you sad and getting rid of them completely. It's down to the people you chose to spend time with, and the ways you chose to handle situations, and the perspective you chose to look at problems with. I love you and the person you are, and I love the potential and hope I feel when I look at the person you could become. Keep pushing your limits, don't dwell on your faults but instead make plans to change them, be strong and loving and bright. Don't let other people put you down, but more importantly don't put yourself down. Your mistakes are not failings, they are opportunities to learn. Try new things, go to new places, read all the books you can and watch all the movies you want to and learn from everything you experience. Take time for yourself, you don't have to be creating or learning every minute of every day. It's okay to relax sometimes, just don't lose sight of where you're going. Make good choices, and if for whatever reason you don't then be willing to apologise and fix them or stand by them. Have high expectations for yourself, but don't be ashamed if you can't quite reach them; the important thing is that you try. I love you, Angel. Other people love you. Make us all proud.
I read over some of my old posts and what can I say? Some things have changed a lot...Some things haven't changed at all.
How was 2014 for me? Overall it was great. There were some rough bits, but looking back I think 2014 was the happiest I've been for a very long time and thats a great feeling.
Today is my last day off before starting work again for 2015, and although sometimes I dislike parts of my job I am pretty pleased with it. They're obviously pleased with me because I was given a promotion and then a pay rise shortly after, which was nice. It's always nice to be appreciated for your efforts.
I've cut back on etsy orders significantly since getting a full time job, although I still do some here and there for my friends. It's far more enjoyable now I dont have to stress out about deadlines and shipping, and I've finally gotten to a point where I don't feel guilty spending my time on other things which has improved my mood greatly. I've been playing POE, and yesterday I bought the new COD game which is super weird because it feels like some sort of Halo/COD hybrid.
During last year I started to make some changes to my life that put a more prominent focus on improving myself and I'm happy with how those are going. I've been learning Spanish, which for a long time didn't seem to be improving at all, but in the last few months I have finally noticed an improvement there. I've also been doing archery, which I really enjoy. One of my goals for this year is to renew my efforts there, I got kind of lazy with it because I don't like going by myself. I'd really like to be competing by this time next year and getting my compound bow later this year should help with that considerably.
I've been singing more, doing scales and breathing exercises to help expand my range. I've been drawing more too, not just random stuff but actual practice pieces. At the moment I'm doing a facial features study and the progress I've made in just a week has blown me away.
As of next week I'll be attending the gym again. I joined up again a month or so ago but public holidays, time off, and family stuff meant I haven't really been a whole lot. I like the gym, the hardest part is dragging myself out of bed early enough to get there before work.
My other 2015 hobbies include violin, which I cant really claim to have achieved anything with yet and a couple of other new things that I'd like to get into. I'm pretty excited for the year ahead. For the first time in my life I am not adverse to practicing things and I look forward to seeing where this new mentality is going to take me.
As I mentioned, 2014 had some rough patches. My Nanna passed away late November which was tough, she was the only extended family I was really close with and she had been a big part of my life since the day I was born. I was devastated at the funeral, and it's surprising to me how often I catch myself thinking 'I should take a photo of this to show Nanna' or thinking I see her on the street. Weird little things that leave me feeling a little sad. Losing people is hard, but I know she's in a better place now. Her life was hard and she was in so much pain. I'm glad I had the time with her that I did though, to get to know her and love her.
Something I didn't expect though was that she would leave money to me in her will. I always anticipated that my mother and sister would be left something, they saw her nearly every day and helped her more than anyone else, but she surprised me by leaving me $15 000. More money than I've ever ever had in my life, and although I would trade that money for more time with her in a heartbeat, I'm so grateful for her kindness.
At this stage I'm planning to use 1 third of the money as the start of a home loan deposit, 1 third to book a trip to Europe (London, Paris and Rome) and the other third to buy a compound bow and a deep space telescope; two things I've wanted for a long time but that keep getting pushed down the list of 'things I actually need to buy'. She also left me her ruby earrings and a diamond and ruby necklace that I've barely taken off since.
So that was my 2014, and some of my plans for 2015. From here down it's just a letter to future me. I doubt anyone but I read these posts, and that suits me fine, but when you re read this, me, pay attention to the below-
Hey Angel,
2015 is a new start, and I want you to promise not to waste it. Looking back 10 years and at the time between then and now there were moments when I never thought I'd live to this day let alone be as happy as I am, that change is down to you. It's down to finding the things that make you happy and focusing on them. It's down to finding the things that make you sad and getting rid of them completely. It's down to the people you chose to spend time with, and the ways you chose to handle situations, and the perspective you chose to look at problems with. I love you and the person you are, and I love the potential and hope I feel when I look at the person you could become. Keep pushing your limits, don't dwell on your faults but instead make plans to change them, be strong and loving and bright. Don't let other people put you down, but more importantly don't put yourself down. Your mistakes are not failings, they are opportunities to learn. Try new things, go to new places, read all the books you can and watch all the movies you want to and learn from everything you experience. Take time for yourself, you don't have to be creating or learning every minute of every day. It's okay to relax sometimes, just don't lose sight of where you're going. Make good choices, and if for whatever reason you don't then be willing to apologise and fix them or stand by them. Have high expectations for yourself, but don't be ashamed if you can't quite reach them; the important thing is that you try. I love you, Angel. Other people love you. Make us all proud.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)